Tag Archive | high school

HerCampus Ambassadors!

HerCampus Ambassadors!

Video chatting with an extraordinary group of ladies from all across the nation (even in Canada!) that share the same passions as I do for writing and journalism. Feeling blessed and happy to have talked to them and to have found out all of our similar interests. ♥ Let’s make this a great year as Ambassadors, ladies!

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You Don’t Know

Coming home and seeing a messy room, I knew that it was about time to finally clean it. After all, a fresh school year = a fresh room… Right? So, I was looking through my old documents and I came across the journal I had a few years back. Turns out, I wrote lyrics to a song I made up. This is from January 12, 2011 (just the rap, HAHA):

I know I gotta get this right off all my chest

I know by saying this, I might be a total pest

But you gotta understand

You gotta know

 

That before I sleep I will myself

To have you in my dreams

That to me being with you

Is better than sweets or creams

That I memorize the tune

Your digits make on my phone

That to me you are a savior

Just like Arc de Joan

 

You don’t know

that I write songs about you

Day after Day

Don’t know that I write texts to you

Anxious if they are okay

That your face your smile your words

refuse to exit my mind

That I find myself doodling hearts

with your  name next to mine

 

You don’t know.

And you never will.

 

Cheesy, yes? Oh, memories… 🙂

Christmas Spiel

Lately, there have been a numerous amount of hardships/conflicts going on in my life. I suppose it’s all because of me and the stress levels of “hell week” for the last week before winter break (filled with tests) that I began to shrug off everybody’s “hello’s” or attempts to get closer with me. I realized that to most friendships, there is a certain limit to how long it can last (in my experiences). It’s made of the same material as the Statue of Liberty; the Americans thought the Statue of Liberty would always stand tall, strong, and brilliant, representing the freedom that our nation brings. However, it has changed colors, and is slowly chipping away as we speak. Maybe friendships change color over times. Maybe they are slowly getting chipped away at. Maybe fate wields a small hammer that breaks apart all the ties in our lives. Maybe. But, I suppose my point is, there’s always a way to fix them. It IS reversible, no matter what you think. Maybe it’s due to the Christmas spirit, but I’ve been attempting to make amends with the friends and family members that I have grown apart with, and I must say. It feels great. There are so many little things in life that add the spice and flavor to the soup; You need to add ingredients in, little by little, at different times in your life, in order to come out with the best outcome possible. Some things are meant to happen. And I think that every meeting with every person has added to some of my experience, making me really learn about myself and the world in general. Instead of focusing on our differences, let’s instead use them to make ourselves grow as individuals and flourish underneath the gracious light of Fate as it guides us to make all these unique bonds. Here’s my list of the little things in life that I am thankful for:

1) The way that my Dad always asks me how my day was during dinner time, even though he is tired from his day at work.

2) The way that my mother can sometimes be my best friend; A person that I can share my secrets and girly fears with.

3) The way that my brother is so down-to-earth and painfully honest with his opinions that makes me value the few compliments that I get from him.

4) My grandmother who always says that I should be a model (which I know can never happen, but it makes me feel wonderful inside that she thinks I’m beautiful; both on the inside and outside)

5) The way that my father always waits for me to give him his good night kiss before going to sleep (he refuses to sleep otherwise… what a kid ;D)

6) How I can always depend on my online friends… sometimes even more than I can expect from my school friends.

7) How my parents always make me eat the last bite of the meal, saying that the youngest needs to eat the most.

8) The way that my mother brags about me and my brother to all of her friends at church.

9) The way that my father notices when my mother is too tired to make food, so he takes us out to eat whatever we’d like to.

10) The love that all my friends and family shower onto me every single moment of my lives. ♥

Thanks all, for reading my spiel about Christmas and why I love this time of year. Any comments about what little things of life make it special to you?

linux-christmas

These Hateful Hands and its Hateful Heart

These Hateful Hands and its Hateful Heart

A galaxy of thoughts

Rushing through my head

As my trembling hands

Sought what was ahead

It was always right there

So close yet so Far

That impossible motion

To change My into Our

Like two cars colliding

Our threads of fate entwined

The beautiful doves meeting

The stars had aligned

A flower unfurling

Its petals One by One

You showed me the world

Then it came all undone

You stole my shoelaces

Do you know how I felt?

You traveled farther ahead

Leaving me here to melt

I melted, I melted

From

The pressure

The heartache

The expectations

The dream once deferred

What is my life?!

The pendulum had suspended

Exiting my being

My heartbeat now broken

I find myself fleeing

Fleeing from

The trouble

The corruption

My heart’s double

You call me a coward

What else am I to do?

I stare down

At my hands

These hateful hands

The ones that held yours

The ones that sought you

The ones that gave up

The ones that knew

Knew my true heart

Knew my soul’s crying

Knew my refusal

To keep on My trying

These hateful hands

This hateful heart

My body is a puppet

Bending apart

The only ones truthful

Are my hands and its heart

My eyes refuse to stare

My legs do not budge

My mouth does not speak

My brain still holds a grudge

His leaving silhouette

His back that’s still Proud

My hands stretch out towards him

Is my racing heart allowed?

The marionette that I am

I just watch him go

The pain is so cutting

So agonizing and slow

My body convulses

As my sobs overtake me

The only truthful part of my body

Still stretching

Why do they still move?

Why have we grown apart?

These hateful hands

And its hateful heart